


The Beginning

by TheTruthIsOutWhere



Category: Supernatural
Genre: JUST LET THEM BE HAPPY, M/M, Post-Episode: s15e19 Inherit the Earth, finale fix it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-21
Updated: 2020-11-21
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:40:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,997
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27653545
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheTruthIsOutWhere/pseuds/TheTruthIsOutWhere
Summary: Still working through my post finale feelings by writing. Cas gets the rescue he deserves, Sam and Dean got the chance to design their own lives.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 4
Kudos: 65





	The Beginning

They pull Cas out of the empty on a Thursday. Dean will ruminate on the irony of that later, instead in the moment he just clutches Cas to him for all he’s worth. Sam has an arm around Eileen, almost giggling in relief as he watches his brother separate from Cas with a few rough pats to his back. Dean pulls back but leaves his left hand to linger on Cas’ shoulder as he points with his right.

“Enough with the self sacrificing crap! You got it Cas? Chuck’s off the board and we’re all in this for the long haul now. No more apocalypses, no more unnecessary deaths. Understood?”

Cas slowly smiles and responds “I’ve got you Dean.”

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It’s 2 months later, on a Friday, when their new normal breaks down. In lieu of anyone actually figuring out what do with an unscripted life, they’d been doing what they already knew best, hunting. Just good, old fashioned milk runs and salt and burns. Eileen had moved into the bunker permanently (into Sam’s room but he was attempting not to think about that too closely), and Cas was back in his own room for good. Now that the empty had drained his grace he even finally had occasion to actually use the bed. Jack was… well off doing whatever he did now, or in a raindrop or whatever the hell that speech was about. Dean missed him but no one talked about him much. It was too much like picking away at a fresh scab, they had to let it heal first.

Dean felt truly content for maybe the first time in his entire life. Maybe not happy yet, but he was still wasn’t entirely sure that was possible for him in this life. There was no imminent disaster looming, his family was safe and (mostly) under one roof, and his brother was smiling a majority of every day. Dean had no complaints. But it seemed Sam had been doing a little more planning for the future while Dean had been living in the moment.

Cas and Dean were sat across from each other in the library. Dean in front of his computer while Cas sifted through a leather-bound volume in Enochian. Dean smiled at his brother as he and Eileen came into the room and stopped at the head of the table. Sam looked at Dean and signed as he spoke, “Can we talk to you guys about something?”

Dean smiled and answered easily, “Sure, what’s up?” as Cas signed “of course” across from him.

“Eileen and I have been thinking, and talking a lot, about what we want to do now that Chuck’s gone. Now that we have a choice. Now that we’re free. And well, we want to move in together, in a house. Outside the bunker. Try and live like normal people for once.”

Heading off his brother’s possible retort Sam kept talking swiftly “We’ll still hunt! Or likely we still will for now. I’ve been thinking about law school again and Eileen would like to visit Ireland. We just want to live our lives…”

Sam trailed off and met Dean’s gaze. He wasn’t expecting the full and genuine smile across Dean’s face as he stood up and hugged him.

“Of course you do Sammy! Of course you want that. You can have that now and I’m so happy for you. Just don’t move too far away, ok?”

Sam looked over Dean’s shoulder at Castiel, shock clear on his face. Cas echoed the sentiment but then smiled at Dean’s back. Cas was so proud of Dean, he was finally letting go. Dean finally realized that his brother was never truly leaving him just because he wanted to live his own life. Stepping away Sam cleared his throat as Dean also hugged Eileen in congratulations.

“What will you guys do? Will you stay here?” Sam asked.

Cas tilted his head in acknowledgment of the question and glanced at Dean who turned his head to look back at the former angel. Dean really hadn’t thought too much about the future but he had known he would never leave the bunker as long as his brother was in it. But now that Sam and Eileen were leaving there was something he’d always wanted to do…

“Actually I’ve thought about buying a piece of land and building my own house. Making it exactly how I want and where I want. With a huge garage for baby of course.”

As he said it he knew this was right, that this was the next part of his journey. Dean looked over to Cas who looked positively glee-ridden that Dean was choosing to do something for himself.

“What’d ya say Cas? Want to learn a thing or two about construction?”

Cas replied, “Of course. I’ll go with you Dean.”

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It takes 2 months for Dean and Cas to find the perfect site. Just outside of Lebanon, which, turns out, is only a 15-minute drive from the house that Sam and Eileen bought. It’s rural but still close to town, surrounded by trees, and within walking distance of a secluded lake (complete with a private dock actually in pretty good shape). The instant Dean sets foot on it he knows it’s right. In fact it looks eerily similar to a place he once dreamed about…

Once he finds the place Dean launches into the process of construction. Sure he doesn’t really know what he’s doing, but between his googling skills and Cas’ infinite knowledge of structural engineering he thinks they do pretty well. They frame out a four-bedroom house and a huge attached garage and by the time winter hits they actually have a structure to live in. Even if the plumbing isn’t exactly hooked up yet. By the time the new year rolls around they’ve even got that too.  
Spending time with Cas has been somewhat… painful. They’ve never talked about Cas’ pre-death confession. That’s probably mostly on Dean but Cas does look distinctly uncomfortable every time an adjacent subject comes up. All the same, Dean has loved their time together building. Cas has settled in to human life: changing clothes, showering, eating, the whole deal. But in some ways that’s making everything harder. Dean feels like they’re building a life together here, a home, and as far as Cas knows they’re just best friends. 

Dean was never sure what Cas’ confession meant that day. He’s been over and over it a million times in his head. He supposes Cas could have meant he loved him as a friend, as family, but somehow that doesn’t seem right. Dean always comes back to the beginning of his speech, “The one thing I want, I know I can’t have.” What did he mean? Dean was too afraid to hazard a guess, and too afraid to ask, so he was stuck in this stalemate. He was so close to what he’d always wanted: a life where Cas sticks around, where Cas is always by his side. He can admit to himself now that is what he always wanted. Just Cas. Just the (former) angel he loves to stay with him until the day he dies. Now he even hopes that day isn’t too soon.

It took a long time for him to admit to himself he loved Cas, and an even longer time for him to accept that he was very, very attracted to an angel in a dude-shaped vessel. He’s still never told anyone that out loud. But with each passing day pounding nails and sanding boards Dean is losing a bit of his will power. It wears even thinner as spring approaches and Cas’ outfits evolve from thermal shirts, to rolled up sleeves, to tank tops and shorts. Jesus Christ that man’s thighs and forearms should be illegal. 

Finally, on a solo visit to see Sam and Eileen (for some reason Cas actually likes staining wood and wanted to keep working on his own…), Dean feels like it’s time to come clean to his brother.

“I’m in love with Cas” he finally blurts out. They’re sitting on the steps of Sam’s front porch, a beer in each of their hands. Eileen had gone inside to take a call on her cell phone and Dean had found himself just spouting out the words. Sam pauses with the beer halfway to his mouth and then blinks and sets it back down on the porch.

Sam looks at his brother blankly for several moments and finally a smirk spreads across his face. “Yeah, I know you idiot.”

Dean’ mouth drops open. “What!?”

“Oh come on, Dean, did you really think you were being subtle? You two stare at each other CONSTANTLY. You two are so incredibly obvious I’m frankly shocked you haven’t already been banging for years!”

Once Dean is able to close his mouth again he replies, “Banging!? What fucking year is it Sam? Gross.”

Sam knows it’s a deflection so he lets it go and responds, “Fucking, screwing, making love, whatever you want to call it dude, you guys should have been doing it years ago. You didn’t really think it would bother me did you?”

Dean is still too hung up momentarily on the term “making love” to fully process that question but when he does he freezes.

“I guess, I never really knew how you’d react. We never talked about things like that, my fault I know, but I always knew how Dad would take it. Badly. So I guess I never said anything, to anyone, and figured I’d probably die before I had to deal with it anyways.”

“And yet, here you are.”

“Dealing with it, yeah… What do I do Sammy?”

Sam looks briefly confused, “What do you mean? I mean why not just tell him?”

Dean looks panicked, “Tell him!? What if he doesn’t feel the same way?? I could mess everything up Sam!”

“Wow ok. You’re more of an idiot than I thought Dean.”

“Hey! Wait, what?”

Sam raises his eyes skyward and heaves a put upon sigh. “You’re really telling me that after everything we’ve been through, after everything Cas has done for you, you think he’s not head over heels in love with you?”

Dean’s knee-jerk reaction is to respond in the negative but instead he pauses and starts to think. He really thinks about every interaction they’ve ever had. Every time Cas offered to go with him, to face certain death, to defy God, angels, and heaven. For him. He thinks of Cas telling him Dean changed him. He thinks of Cas smiling through tears as he looks Dean straight in the eye and tells him he loves him, that the one thing he wants he can’t have. And Dean knows. He knows now how much of an idiot he’s been.

Sam sees the clarity come across Dean’s face and rolls eyes. “Wow I think he finally got it.”

Eileen chooses that moment to re-emerge and sets down her beer so she can speak as she signs “Got what?”

Dean squeaks a frantic “Nothing!” as Sam wraps an arm around her, and after kissing her temple says, “I’ll tell you later.”

Dean spits out his mouthful of beer.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

He means to talk to Cas as soon as he gets back to the house. He really does. But as he walks in the door and sees Cas parked against a wall (they don’t have a couch yet) watching Dr. Sexy on their newly installed TV, he just can’t. He’s too chicken to risk this yet, even though he knows deep down he wouldn’t be risking anything. Instead he grabs another beer, pops the cap, and slides down next to Cas. They’re so used to each other that he only gets a small smile from the former angel before they’re both fully immersed in the episode and talking about the finer plot points. Cas thinks maybe Timothy, the new nurse, will end up with Dr. Sexy on the next episode, Dean doesn’t disagree.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Saturday, two days later, they’re both in the final guest bedroom installing drywall. Each have a nail gun in their hands as they affix the final pieces in place. The work has a steady hum and cadence to it, the shunk, shunk, shunk of the nail gun soothes Dean. He’s even humming a Led Zeppelin song he thinks vaguely matches the beat when it’s broken by an exhaled “fuck” across the room. The expletive coming from Cas is so unusual that Dean immediately stills. He shakes it off and turns to joke about what Cas screwed up now when he sees red. Literally. There’s blood all over Cas’ hands and the newly hung drywall. Dean is across the room instantly, entirely adrenaline fueled. He scans Cas quickly and realizes the blood is indeed coming from Cas’ hand, likely the left based on the amount of blood. He’s grabbing Cas before he realizes it and hauling him across the hall to the only functioning bathroom. 

Dean’s in panic mode now, shoving Cas’ hand under the faucet and trying to wash the blood away to find the source. He’s sure Cas has taken a nail through the hand and in his head he’s planning fastest routes to the closest hospitals, thinking about whether he should take the nail out or leave it in, if he still has dental floss in his first aid kit… Where is his first aid kit!? He’s so panicked it takes him a second to realize, there is no nail in Cas’ hand. The blood is coming from the webbing between his thumb and pointer finger, the nail just nicked it. He’s so relieved, so quickly, that he feels nauseous and jittery and as he begins to focus on his surroundings he feels Cas’ other hand trying to turn his head to face him.

“…Ean, Dean, Dean!” It’s clear Cas has been trying to getting Dean’s attention for some time. As he focuses on Cas’ face he continues “I’m fine, Dean. I’m fine. I just nicked my hand with the nail gun, I wasn’t paying close enough attention. It’s ok. I’m sure it’ll stop bleeding soon we just need to wash it and wrap it up.”

Dean is turning the words over and over in his head and slowly they’re starting to make sense. Cas can tell though that Dean’s reaction isn’t normal, especially considering the trauma they’ve seen. Suddenly Dean slumps back against the counter and wipes his hand across his face.

“Jesus. Sorry Cas. That scared the shit out of me.”

Cas drops his good hand and finishes rinsing off the bloody one before turning the water off. Luckily there’s a roll of paper towels by the sink so he quickly wraps his hand to at least staunch future bleeding. As he finishes he turns to Dean and appraises him with a quizzical expression. 

“Dean, that reaction was somewhat out of character for you.”

Dean was hoping they’d gloss right over this but here they are.

“You’ve seen much, much more gore than the average person. You’ve seen death, destruction, and hell. What just happened?”

Dean takes a deep breath to give himself a moment to decide… is he doing this? Apparently so, because his mouth is already moving.

“It’s you Cas.”

Cas tilts his head and scrunches his brow in confusion.

“This is my happy ending dude. It’s you. It always was. We beat the devil, we beat God, it’s just us and the occasional monster, and I want to live in this house we built together. I’m happy here with you. Seeing that blood that whole dream just briefly went up in smoke. That nightmare that was our lives before just got dumped back on my lap and I didn’t know what to do. I can’t go back, Cas. I can’t lose any more people I love. I can’t lose you!”

Cas looks like he just got punched in the gut so Dean figures he might as well keep talking.

“I know we don’t talk about it, or at least we never have, but that goodbye you gave me? Before the empty took you? That destroyed me. You gave me hope that maybe you could really love me too, that we could be together. And then you were just gone. Forever, you said. Thank whoever that turned out not to be true. I just… I just can’t go through that again Cas. I physically can’t.”

Dean thinks that Cas now looks slightly nauseous on top of the punched in the gut look so he figures he might as well keep talking. He opens his mouth to do so but then Cas jumps in. “What do you mean “too?”

“Huh?”

“What do you mean, you thought I could love you too?”

Dean steels himself for this and then looks Cas directly in the eye.

“I love you Cas. I’ve been in love with you for so long I’m not even really sure when it started. I was never brave enough to tell you until now and that was almost my biggest regret, the one I would have taken to the grave. You always deserved to know, even if you didn’t feel it back. I just wasn’t as brave as you I guess.”

Dean looks devastated when his eyes meet Cas’ again, he’s not entirely sure when he focused down on his shoes but apparently eye contact was just a bit too much. As soon as he looks up Cas is hauling him to his feet by his arms and places both hands (paper towel covered or otherwise) on either side of his face. He searches his eyes for a second, Dean’s not entirely sure what for, and then says:

“Dean, you complete…”

Dean doesn’t find out a complete what though (though he has some ideas: idiot, moron, asshole, take your pick), because Cas very soundly and firmly kisses him. Dean’s kissed a lot of women, sure ok not recently, but he did just fine a few years back thank you. This isn’t like that and it’s frankly about a million times better than his feeble brain had been able to imagine. The contact zings through him completely and all he can do is hang on and pull Cas as close as he can get him. Cas doesn’t even really know what he’s doing, but damn it doesn’t seem to matter. Dean finally gets with the program and joins in, licking the seam of their mouths with his tongue and deepening an already intense kiss. He can feel Cas’ deep groan throughout his entire body. The bathroom they’re in isn’t overly large but Cas has him fully pushed against the vanity so it doesn’t even matter. Dean snakes both hands under Cas’ infuriating skimpy tank top and presses and feels the firm and corded muscle of his back. The pressure causes Cas’ leg to slide between his own and press against his groin. The moan he lets out is 100% involuntary. Dean’s not sure he’s ever been this turned on in his life.

The moan causes him to tilt his head back for air but Cas isn’t stopping. He’s kissed his way across Dean’s neck and pushed aside Dean’s Metallica shirt to reach his collarbone before Dean even has time to collect himself.

“Cassss. Fuck. We should, we should move to my room. Slow this down probably.”

Cas glances up at him, “Do you want to stop?”

Dean moans, “Not at all.”

Cas smirks, “Here’s fine.”

Before Dean can even argue with him again Cas has shoved his hand down his sweat pants and past his boxer briefs and has a firm hold of his cock, stroking quickly up and down. Dean jerks forward and involuntarily grasps both of Cas’ shoulder blades under his shirt to hold on.

“Unh… shit, Cas!”

Cas must be feeling pretty cocky because he’s smirking again and definitely not slowing down. Dean wants to retaliate but his brain is currently a pile of mush. Instead he uses the leverage he has from under Cas’ shirt to pull it off, causing them to temporarily break contact. He pulls his own off while he’s at it and when he resurfaces Cas has also pushed his shorts and boxers down past his own cock. Dean almost chokes but instead pulls Cas in from a brief but steamy kiss. Then he sends out a quick prayer to whoever is listening now (hopefully not Jack…) that gay porn is a little more accurate than straight porn tends to be, pushes his own sweatpants down, and grasps both their cocks with his hand. He resumes the pace Cas had set, and something must be going right because Cas moans and lays his head down on Dean’s shoulder as if he can no longer support his own weight. Dean turns so he can speak directly into Cas’ ear.

“Oh I’ve got you angel, I want you to feel so good Cas. I’ve thought about this for so long. Touched myself just like this thinking about you. Can you come for me Cas please? I want to see it, want to hear you.”

Cas seems totally wrecked and hangs on for dear life, scrabbling at Dean’s back for purchase, and groans deeply into Dean’s neck. A few more strokes and he’s coming between them, almost jack knifed in half from the pleasure. Just the sounds and feel of Cas coming have Dean shooting over the edge as well. 

Dean feels totally boneless as he sinks to the floor, taking Cas with him. He props Cas up with his arm so his head rests on his shoulder. They both breathe heavily as they try to find their equilibrium again. Dean’s feeling a lot of things all at once. He’s staring at the ceiling trying to process and feels like he might burst. First he realizes he’s got a huge goofy grin on his face so it makes sense that the next thing to surface is a relieved, euphoric, giggle. An honest to god (if you’ll excuse the expression), giggle. Cas jerks, almost startled, and lifts up to face Dean, also smiling. He looks concerned for a second and when he brushes his finger across Dean’s cheek it’s clear Dean is also crying. Jesus, apparently he’s a mess. Once Cas clears up that Dean is, in fact, all right they both clean up quickly and smile the whole time. They work together to rewrap Cas’ hand, now mostly not bleeding, and walk almost shyly back to Dean’s bedroom.

Housework can wait for the rest of the day so they lay down to regroup on Dean’s bed. Well it’s really just his memory foam mattress on the floor at the moment, but they’ll get there. Cas lays his head across Dean’s chest and Dean feels as though he absolutely could burst. He can’t physically stop himself from blurting out “I love you Cas.”

Cas turns his head up to smile at Dean and responds, “I love you too, Dean. I always have.”

Dean isn’t just content, he’s happy. He’s got all he’s ever wanted. Cas happily stares out at Dean’s unfinished room (hopefully now soon to be both their room) and asks “Do you think we should add a bookshelf in that corner? I’m getting very adept at woodwork I bet I could make you one.”

Dean beams even though Cas can’t see him. “Why, so you can store all your nerdy crap in here?” 

Dean laughs and Cas shoot him a glare. “I think we both know who the “nerd” in this relationship is here Dean Winchester.”

Dean mimes fake offense at the statement, and then starts laughing again. He looks at the corner Cas had indicated and then back to Cas’ smiling face. As he brushes a lock of Cas’ unruly mop of black hair back he responds, “I think you’re right Cas, our room could use a bookshelf in that corner.”


End file.
